


Team Building?

by Ann7121



Category: Blake's 7
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-01
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2019-07-05 10:04:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15861441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ann7121/pseuds/Ann7121
Summary: Blake reconsiders his plan to unite his crew after some information from Zen.





	Team Building?

Blake wearily pinched the bridge of his nose where a headache was forming. Why on Earth had he suggested such a scheme? He’d throw that Team Building For Beginners pamphlet he’d got from Avalon into the recycler at the earliest opportunity.

“Don’t you think black walls and a black ceiling might be a little oppressive, Avon?” he tried. “I was thinking more along the lines of a nice mushroom or magnolia....”. 

The snort of derision from the computer tec indicated that that suggestion had better curl up and die pretty quickly....Blake had expected that... What he hadn’t expected were the equally dismissive snorts from Jenna, Cally ..even Gan.

“Magnolia, Blake?” Jenna couldn’t have sounded more disappointed if he’d suggested painting the walls with goose turd green (secretly his second choice). 

“We need something a little more punchy than beige, Blake..”. 

Gods, even Gan was patronising him...

“It’s well documented that darker colours are more likely to induce a calm mood amongst those stressed by repeated adventures, Blake. I suggest a deep purple would best fit....”

“Adventures, Cally? That would be an Auron euphemism for life and death struggles I presume?” Avon interrupted.

“Yes well,” Blake intervened, not before the projected hiss of telepathic annoyance had exploded in all their heads causing a temporary disinterest in the problem in hand.... “Yes,” he continued once the stabbing pain had subsided.. “Well, Vila....we haven’t heard from you.”

“ I don’t see much wrong with the walls as they are, actually, “ Vila proffered diffidently. “I like silver grey...and painting the entire flight deck involves an awful lot of hard labour...”

“ What do you mean?”  
“Trust you to avoid work.”  
“Oh Vila..”  
“Hard work never killed anyone, Vila.”  
“ Zen, is this true?” 

As the spontaneous responses died down, the silence was broken by Zen’s sonorous tones:

\+ Information. Vila Restal is correct. To ensure the paint adheres to the walls the surface s would need to be roughened with an abrasive medium several times; then washed thoroughly with a solution of disaccharides and finally rinsed with an aqua-based solvent. All surfaces would need to be primed, under coated and...+

“ Do you have a timescale for such an enterprise?” Avon asked peremptorily. He was stroking one hand across the palm of the other...a sure sign he was rattled. 

+Estimated time for preparation 192 time units...Estimated time for priming the area 72 time units ...Estimated time for undercoating the area 48 time units...Estimated time for painting the area 48 time units...+

“ 192 plus.....Good grief that’s about 3/4 of a year...” Blake worked out. “What will happen to our rebellion in the meantime?”

“What indeed?” Avon purred, perking up a little. 

+Estimated outfits ruined during the enterprise..+ Zen continued, “ 72... The Liberator will run out of leather before the work is completed and...+ 

“No leather!” Avon’s protest came out in a falsetto squeak and Jenna looked dubious. 

“Silver grey it is then,” Vila observed.

And for once, no one disagreed with him. 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

For anyone wondering how Zen reached the figure of 72 ruined outfits: 

+Information. 

As requested by Roj Blake, this unit has analysed the probably outcomes to the leather outfits worn by the crew during the re-imagining of the flight deck and corridors leading to it, as follows. 

-4 outfits ruined when Kerr Avon sits at his station to find that Vila Restal has left his paint brush, paint tin lid, a spot of paint or dirty paint rag on it. (Kerr Avon suspects this is deliberate....he is right)

-7 outfits ruined ( various crew members) when rushing from quarters to flight deck in response to an emergency and brush against a still damp wall.

-3 outfits ruined when Olag Gan turns to answer a query with a paintbrush in hand and accidentally smears both Roj Blake’s and Jenna Stannis’ outfits. Kerr Avon’s is ruined when he he is caught by Jenna Stannis smiling at her predicament.

-3 outfits ruined when the Liberator passes through what Vila Restal calls ‘a swirly red space thingy’ and catapults crew members across the flight deck to collide with a newly painted wall. 

-8 outfits ruined when Kerr Avon argues with with Roj Blake on four separate occasions about whether to paint the ceilings before the walls, the upper walls before the lower, or whether to paint the walls at all.

-8 outfits ruined when Kerr Avon argues with Roj Blake on four separate occasions about whether his decisions to paint the ceilings before the walls, the upper walls before the lower, or to paint the walls at all, were sensible decisions or those of a despotic maniac with the IQ of a slime worm.

-3 outfits ruined by Cally when, under the influence of an alien presence, she has to be restrained, and in the resulting melee, copious amounts of paint are transferred from the walls to Roj Blake’s, her own and Kerr Avon’s outfits.

-4 outfits ruined by Olag Gan when a power outage causes a temporary glitch in the operation of his limiter and he has to be restrained, resulting in damage to Roj Blake, Kerr Avon, Jenna Stannis and Cally’s outfits.

-8 outfits ruined when paint fumes cause Vila Restal to ‘come over all funny’ and bump into Roj Blake while he is holding an open paint pot just as Jenna Stannis, Kerr Avon and Cally are passing down the corridor with replacement outfits

-1 outfit ruined when Kerr Avon overestimates the stretch potential of skin tight leather and reaches up to fill in a bit the the other morons he is forced to work with have missed.

Information.

Attempts to remove paint stains in Liberator’s laundry unit will result in irreversible shrinking of the leather. +

Roj Blake: We could all wear painting smocks for the duration I suppose.  
Kerr Avon: Over my dead body.


End file.
